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June 30, 2013

Me & Munchies

You Are a Dark Chocolate M&M


You like to consider yourself sophisticated but still able to let loose and have fun.

You are a person of discriminating taste, but you are able to go anywhere. You just try to choose the best option whenever possible.

You are excited by the future, and you try new products as soon as they become available.


You think innovation is very exciting. You love technology and enjoy playing with the newest gadgets.

You may seem materialistic at times, but you just appreciate things more than most people.


When you go out shopping, you feel like a kid in a candy store. There's so much you'd like to own.




Borderline Trivia

Did you know there is supposed to be ten feet of both sides of the Canada–United States border free of trees, brush and other obstructions?

If you ever look at the border on Google Earth (or Bing Maps) it might not be obvious on flat prairie land, but it's more apparent through wooded areas, such as this Google Earth screen shot of northern Washington state.


See more US-Canada border information:

More Than You Probably Ever Cared to Know About the US-Canada Border

June 27, 2013

lese majesty


lese majesty lese majesty [lez, leez] noun

1. Law.
a. a crime, especially high treason, committed against the sovereign power.
b. an offense that violates the dignity of a ruler.

2. an attack on any custom, institution, belief, etc., held sacred or revered by numbers of people: Her speech against Mother's Day was criticized as lese majesty.


Sounds like a crime this administration might use to charge the TEA Party or other patriots who want to keep their Constitutional rights and are speaking out.

Nighttime Image of Texas Cities


From the site: One of the Expedition 36 crew members aboard the International Space Station, some 240 miles above Earth, used a 50mm lens to record this oblique nighttime image of a large part of the nation’s second largest state in area, including the four largest metropolitan areas in population. The extent of the metropolitan areas is easily visible at night due to city and highway lights. 

The largest metro area, Dallas-Fort Worth, often referred to informally as the Metroplex, is the heavily cloud-covered area at the top center of the photo. Neighboring Oklahoma, on the north side of the Red River, less than 100 miles to the north of the Metroplex, appears to be experiencing thunderstorms. The Houston metropolitan area, including the coastal city of Galveston, is at lower right. To the east near the Texas border with Louisiana, the metropolitan area of Beaumont-Port Arthur appears as a smaller blotch of light, also hugging the coast of the Texas Gulf. Moving inland to the left side of the picture one can delineate the San Antonio metro area. The capital city of Austin can be seen to the northeast of San Antonio. 

For larger sizes, visit the Nasa website: Nighttime Image of Texas Cities

Don't Tease the Gorilla


June 26, 2013

Execution Day



It's been in the news lately: Texas to Execute #500 as though it was some sort of crazy fire sale where only the first 500 customers will be given a toaster oven with purchase. Number 500 happens to be a woman, which I'm sure is driving up the media interest along with the "milestone" total.

From the article linked to above: Texas has carried out nearly 40 percent of the more than 1,300 executions in U.S. since the Supreme Court allowed capital punishment to resume in 1976. The state's standing stems from its size as the nation's second most populous state as well as its tradition of tough justice for killers.

I'm not particularly a pro-death penalty advocate, but I'm neither anti-DP, either. I wish for a time when we could value human life more than we do now; if that were the case, then there wouldn't be nearly the need for capital punishment. Until that time however, I would hope that the death penalty would be used almost exactly as how I would want abortions to happen: rarely and only with a good reason.

Pool Party Crasher


June 25, 2013

The Only Ink I Want On Me

Is if my ballpoint leaks in my shirt pocket.

You Should Get An Asian Inspired Tattoo

Mysterious and expressive, you like to show off, but you also like to keep some allure.



And, as soon as I got a tattoo, you'd hear a whirring sound from my mother spinning in her grave. (she'd do the same if I bought a motorcycle or hooked back up with any of a specific few old girlfriends)  It would be my luck if I DID get an Asian inspired tattoo, it would say something like "Stupid Caucasian".

There's Something Fishy About This Sport

In 2010, Bethel University in McKenzie, Tennessee started offering athletic scholarships in competitive bass fishing.  The school is one of over 200 to have a competitive bass fishing team.

June 23, 2013

Bering Sea Bullies

I've been a fan of the Discovery Channel show Deadliest Catch since it first aired.  Here lately, though, it's started going the way of most reality shows with less focus on fishing and more about creating a good guy/bad guy dichotomy between the different boat captains and highlighting the dissension in the crews.  The producers of the show also seem to be "creating drama" where none needs to be; after all, as the show title says, it's one of the deadliest jobs in the world.

The show has slowly been losing my interest;  where I couldn't wait to watch it, I simply don't care now.  I won't go into all the drama that's happened over the last few shows but it was the last episode that's making me think I will probably start watching something else.  I'll try to explain why in as few words as I can.

Most of the captains are superstitious and have rituals they do.  That's fine, although when they pray to the "crab gods" I have to cringe a little bit.  (I'm not an expert on Greek or Roman mythology, but I don't recall any crab gods) One boat, the Northwestern, has a crew member bite the head off a fish that they use for bait.  I've never seen anyone really "forced" to do it and one of the part-owners, the head deck hand, will often do it.

Keith, the captain/owner of the Wizard, is more superstitious than most and that's saying something.  One of his deckhands (Freddy), while on another boat, once shaved his head in a Mohawk cut to change their luck when the pots were coming up empty or nearly so and afterwards they started catching more crab.  On the last episode, Freddy insisted a new hire (a "greenhorn") shave his head and the young man refused.  Freddy went ballistic, threatening the kid and it's easy to see the greenhorn's days are numbered on that boat. (see excerpt from the show)

It's been disturbing to me to see the majority of the comments on the show's Facebook page about the incident; most people are saying they would have done it, that you should "do what the captain says you should do".  What great little Nazis those people would have made!  Several idiots said the young man's refusal to get his head shaved was an indication of how far our society has fallen while others said he should have done it "for the good of the team".  I could rebut that on the post or in this one, but won't.  It's really too asinine to try to explain why and how wrong they are.

I've been around hazing a lot;  it started in junior high, when the eighth graders decided we younger ones had to be initiated into that level of school.  The same thing happened when we entered high school and also in football.  "Worms", the oil field term for "greenhorns" were also hazed during their first days on the job with practical jokes and the ritual of "doping" (a pipe lubricant) their privates. 

I've already written more than I should have on the subject, but I don't understand how tormenting or bullying someone makes them a part of a team.  After my jr. hi. initiation (being held down and punched in the chest with their knuckles, leaving a bruise that lasted for months) I swore I would never let it happen again....and it didn't.

People who like to haze or bully others all for the sake of supposed camaraderie or because of some asinine superstition are nothing short of psychopaths.

June 22, 2013

Banned Borat

Did you know Lebanon was the only Arab country that didn't ban Borat, the 2006 mockumentary starring Sacha Baron Cohen?




June 21, 2013

Sold!

I had been watching the listing for a long time; a few weeks ago it had the caption "Active Opt Contract" which means a buyer had made an offer and the seller had ten days ( I think ) to accept or reject it.  It disappointed me, but since I hadn't yet won the lottery, there was no way I could have purchased it.

I had written about it earlier: Google Earth vs. Bing Maps.  Of course, there was no way in my current financial circumstances I could have bought it, but it was fun to look at it and dream. (*some* might say that was a waste of time, but for me, it was fairly innocent entertainment and didn't hurt anyone but me and not much at that)  I've always wanted some land out in the country, enough to raise a few animals and have a garden that wouldn't be plundered by neighbors or torn up by the local young hoodlums when I was gone.

The property was on the market for a long time, especially considering it looked like it was well worth the money. (the price had even been dropped by nearly half a million bucks not long ago)  It made me wonder just why it was being sold.  At first, I figured the springs might be drying up;  I've seen that before with other similar properties.  I'd find them on Google Earth and use the historical imagery to look at the water levels, then look again on Bing Maps.  One such property showed a 20 acre lake to have dropped several feet in depth - the elevation tool isn't all that accurate, I realize, but the measuring tool showed at least ten feet of shrinkage of shoreline from past years. 

When doing some cursory research on the Savoy, TX property mentioned above, I saw an article from several yrs. ago where the owner had hosted a "protest" meeting of concerned locals in the area.  A power plant was going to be built not far away and in spite of their objections, the permit went through and the facility was built.

I sympathized with them up to a point - most everyone wants progress and energy independence, but there's also the "not in my back yard" crowd, the "NIMBY" movement.  The new plant was far enough away for the owner of the property to not be bothered by noise, but after zooming out and looking at the location geographically-wise, I started to better understand their objection to the plant being sited where it was.

You'll need to click the screen shot, then envision a line from the power plant (in the bottom left corner of the graphic) going from generally southwest to northeast, the direction of prevailing winds in this part of the world during the spring and summer.  You can then see any pollution/particulates generated by the plant would pass right over the property. (the "push pin" graphic is just the edge of the property- the houses and lake are up and to the left of it)


I don't know if that was the reason for the sale and also don't know if there was enough pollution from the plant to make a difference. What did concern me was later reading an article about the Keystone Pipeline and seeing where one of the proposed routes was sited: (the line was made by me and it was the best estimate I could make from the information I read)


So, perhaps the owner of the property was "gettin' out while the gettin' was good".  I've seen loads of nice properties for sale around the Dallas/Denton area but there's also been a BUNCH of drilling down there over the last five or so years.  None of the properties I've seen offer the mineral rights along w/ the land, either.  Growing up in the oil business, I wouldn't have much problem with having an oil or gas well on my land...

...as long as it was MINE.

June 19, 2013

A Feast for the Eyes

Since a frog can't chew its food or use its tongue to get food down its throat, it uses its eyes! The frog's eyes sink down to the roof of its mouth to help push the food down to its stomach.

June 18, 2013

Turning Japanese

You Should Learn Japanese

You're cutting edge, and you are ready to delve into wacky Japanese culture.

From Engrish to eating contests, you're born to be a crazy gaijin. Saiko! 




Turning Japanese - The Vapors

The Lottery is Racist!

I read posts every day, some which make me furious, others make me literally laugh out loud and some that do both and have me SMH.   This is one of that sort, one in a lottery forum I belong to but don't participate in very much.

why do black americans rarely win big jackpots

I wanted to chime in, but didn't.  Others have pointed out the idiocy of the OP more than enough.  Someone went to the trouble of finding official photographs of black lottery winners and others broke down the demographics.

I don't like to get serious in here all that much and won't this time either (or at least blather on interminably about it) , but just say that I'm getting tired of the racist label being thrown out there all the time.  I'm tired of being called a racist because I don't care for this President, tired of being called one because  - in most cases - I support the death penalty and sick to death of being called a racist because I believe something should be done about illegals flooding into this country...and am especially against granting amnesty to those who broke the law coming here and continue to break it by staying and/or using false identification to get benefits they do not deserve.

Using the word "racist" at every turn devalues the true meaning of that word, diminishes the insult when it is directed at people who truly deserve the term.  I don't think they've coined a word or phrase about it as they did "Godwin's Law" regarding using the word "Nazi" in a discussion, but they should.  

June 15, 2013

Night Moves - Bob Seger

You might recognize Matt LeBlanc (Friends) and Daphne Zuniga (Melrose Place). LeBlanc claims to have been drunk during the video, having shared a bottle of tequila with Seger immediately before the shoot.

Animals vs Reporters


Let's Play Two!

Playing for the Seattle Mariners in a 1990 game against the California Angels, Kenny Griffey Sr. and Ken Griffey Jr. became the only father and son teammates in major league baseball to hit back-to-back home runs. They were also the first father and son to play on the same team.


June 14, 2013

Shocking Quiz Results

Your Superpower Should Be Manipulating Electricity

You're highly reactive, energetic, and super charged.

If the occasion calls for it, you can go from 0 to 60 in a split second.


But you don't harness your energy unless you truly need to.


And because of this, people are often surprised by what you are capable of.

Why you would be a good superhero: You have the stamina to fight enemies for days.

Your biggest problem as a superhero: As with your normal life, people would continue to underestimate you.



June 13, 2013

Happy Friday the 13th!

I'm feeling lazy again. What's new? Last published 7/13/12

Bump from a couple of years ago.

No need to waste a perfectly "good" post.


Years ago in a galaxy far, far away....


I hadn't been up very long, so I was sitting there picking at my "supper" my new bride had prepared for me. When you work the night shift (morning tour) on drilling rigs, your day gets turned around and eating spaghetti for "breakfast" is the norm, but still hard to get used to.

Her cooking took even more getting used to.

My wife (now ex) was reading the paper while I sat there watching the clock on the wall tick off the minutes before my ride came to pick me up. All of a sudden, she exclaimed

"Oh gosh, your horoscope!"

"What about it?" I asked without much interest, never having been enthused about that sort of thing. (it always struck me as funny that 100 million Chinese folks were gonna have the exact same sort of day that I was)

"Listen to this!" she went on. "It says 'Beware of working around dangerous machinery' !!!"

I sat there, not saying a thing. I was new to this married business and had made several bad mistakes already, one being that there's no good answers to questions such as "Does this make me look fat?"

("Sort of" isn't one of those good answers, lemme tell ya.)

"And it's Friday the 13th, too!" she exclaimed in fright.

I'm seldom in a good mood after waking up, but not so much after having such a heavy breakfast at nine o'clock at night and definitely not after trying to sleep during the day in a neighborhood full of kids.

What the heck, I thought. I'll torture her a little bit, just like she did me earlier in the afternoon while running the vacuum.

"Y'know, my rig's number is 13." I informed her.

She sat there, looking at me in horror. I went on.

"We're drilling to 13,000 feet, we're 13 miles out on the river road, there's 13 cattle guards between the highway and the rig."

Her mouth was gaped open, her worst fears realized.

"There's also 13 guys on the rig, come to think of it, four guys per crew plus the tool pusher."

For good measure, I went on, "Know what well we're drilling? It's the Flowers #13!" I tried to think of other 13's just to freak her out some more, but that was it.

She sat there for a minute and declared "Well, you'll just have to twist off tonight." using the oil field term for not showing up for work. She was catching on to being a roughneck's wife, for sure.

"I'd better not do that." I told her. "We need the money. " The subject of money was good for getting her to shut up or to talk, whichever one it was I needed her to do at that particular moment. I WAS catching on to this married stuff, I thought.

At the same time, my boss showed up, announcing his arrival with a blast of his car horn. As I started out the door I stopped and said:

"One good thing..." I went on. "If I get killed, you'll probably get a check for $13,000 bucks from the insurance company, I think that's the death benefit."

That wasn't the right thing to say. Maybe I DIDN'T know much about married life. She started to cry. Another impatient honk came from the idling car outside; I glanced at the clock and saw he was late in picking me up. Another minute won't hurt, I thought, and turned to her and with a hug and a quick smooch on the cheek I asked her:

"That's TODAY'S horoscope, right?" She sniffed and nodded her head.

"Think about it..." I said. "Today is nearly over,so my shift will be on the 14th!"

"I've slept THROUGH Friday the 13th!" I assured her.

Immediate relief showed in her eyes, but once again I showed I was a novice at marriage. With an evil grin on my face I said:

"You'll still get the money if I get killed, though."

I DID have some bad luck that day, that Friday the 13th.

It's always bad luck to get hit in the head by a flying lunchbox.

June 12, 2013

spelunk



spelunk spe·lunk [spi-luhngk] verb (used without object)

to explore caves, especially as a hobby.


Even though I have a pretty good case of claustrophobia, I've always liked caves. My phobia isn't a full blown raging case of it, but I just don't like being in tight, cramped spaces and if I wasn't crazy when you put me in a straitjacket, I would be in a matter of a few minutes.  I've been to "civilized" caves, such as Carlsbad Caverns (and want to go back to see the bats come out at sundown) as well as the Inner Space Cavern near Georgetown, Texas (video tour), but I've also explored several lesser-known and smaller caves.

When I was in junior high, I had one of the best teachers I ever had the pleasure of knowing. He was a brilliant man, a full-blood Cherokee Indian with something like six master's degrees and hundreds and hundreds of college credits to boot. I don't really know why he deigned to teach a bunch of knotheads like us, especially since he didn't have much patience for kids, but if you showed an interest, he would go the extra mile to teach you all you could absorb.

He took us on several class trips, one of which was an extended tour of the western part of Oklahoma where he grew up - a bee farm and tombstone factory were two of the stops -  and we spent the entire morning going through a cave system on private land belonging to an old friend of his.

Looking back, it was amazing that we did that; these days schools certainly wouldn't want to be exposed to the potential liability that crawling through caves full of rattlesnakes, bats and other dangers would entail. I could write a thousand words about all the things we did on that one day, but will just relate one story in this post about that trip.

Most of the other kids went fairly far into the cave system, but another guy and I went so far back, we had to start crawling. I stopped when it got too cramped for even that position, but the other guy scooted along on his stomach for another hundred yards, only coming back when he disturbed a colony of bats. (it was too narrow for him to turn around,so he had to scoot backwards) It sends a shiver down my spine thinking about that now.

When we came out, the teacher, the two parents who took cars (my dad being one) and the rest of the class were waiting on us. We were a sight, clothes torn on the rocks, wet and dirty from our spelunking. The teacher just smiled when we told him how far back we had gone and said he had always thought about going even farther, dressing in a wetsuit and greasing himself up so he could fit through the tight spots. He said he thought he could find an underground river that fed some springs in the area.

I'm glad I did that, but wouldn't care to do it again.  I guess that's the difference between that carefree (or careless) boy I was then and the cautious old fart I am today.


Moths of the Texas Panhandle



I stumbled across this video after seeing an article about hummingbird moths and wondering if they were found in these parts. Back when I worked on drilling rigs, all sorts of insects and moths would be attracted to the lights of the rig at night, sometimes so thick around the lights on the floor that they blocked out most of the light and it was hard to see and often far-too-easy to have one fly into your mouth.

I remember one guy I worked with insisting they were hummingbirds, but those are fairly rare up in this part of the country.  Another guy I worked with would catch the huge moths, unroll their "nose" with a pencil, then tape it inside someone's locker.  When he opened it up the next morning, it was always funny to see him startled by the moth frantically fluttering at the guy's eye level.

(EDIT to add: funny to see the guy scared by a moth, but I always felt sorry for the moth; it was cruel, even though I doubt the moth had a very long lifespan.)

My landlady's son, the younger brother of a classmate, was a sophomore one summer when the moths were prolific around the rig and had to do the same project his brother and I had to do at the same age;  catch 50 different insects and pin them to a board and label them.  I took the young man a lunch box full of moths and asst. other insects I caught one night and he later told me he had over 70 different types of insects and got an "A" for the project!

I used to have some Four O'Clock plants by my porch and during the summer,moths would gather nectar out of the flowers that opened in the late afternoon and stayed open until sunrise the next morning.  I had an old black cat that absolutely loved those moths;  he grew tired of playing with them and discovered he liked the taste.  He wouldn't eat the entire thing, but I would find just the head and wings all over the place, even inside where he had brought them in through the cat flaps. (along with lizards, garden snakes, birds and all sorts of creatures.)

June 11, 2013

Knit Pick


I really need to learn how to knit. I've got so much cat hair in my house that if I had the internal organs, I could knit me another cat.



Knit One, Purl Two - Glenn Miller

The Contents Had To Be Funny

When you saw the cover.

You Are Humor



You love to laugh at life, and if possible, get others to laugh along with you.

You believe there's always a humorous side to everything. And your sense of humor ranges from upbeat to very dark.

You are outrageous and very honest. 


You're often the only one willing to say what everyone else is thinking.

You are witty and verbally talented. You like to play with words and say things in interesting ways. 



codger

codger codg·er [koj-er] noun

an eccentric man, especially one who is old.


I used to think it was funny calling an old man a "codger"...until I became one myself.

June 10, 2013

"Baldie" To His Friends

Mr. Clean's first name is Veritably.

June 9, 2013

trousseau



trousseau trous·seau [troo-soh, troo-soh] noun, plural trous·seaux [-sohz, -sohz], trous·seaus.

an outfit of clothing, household linen, etc., for a bride.


My favorite joke about a trousseau.

OK, my ONLY joke about it.

A young woman came back from her honeymoon and her mother went over to the new bride's house the next day to see how it had gone. Her daughter was unpacking and brought out her negligee which had been torn to shreds. The mother was shocked and asked who had done that. The young lady replied that her new husband had caused the damage.

"Didn't he like your trousseau?" asked the mother.

"Oh yes." exclaimed her daughter. "He just liked my torso better than my trousseau, that's why my trousseau is tore so."

Texas Panhandle Supercells

A video diary of a storm chaser from May 8, 2013 taken near Childress.(which is located at the very bottom of the east side of the state line that forms the Panhandle)

June 7, 2013

Sorbet, You Say?

Of course I am!

Chocolate, not all the other things in the results.



You Are Chocolate

On the surface, you are charming and engaging. People love you, and you're naturally popular.

When people dig a bit deeper, they discover your relentless ambitious and drive. You are very goal oriented.

You are refreshing because you have impeccable manners and charm. You get along with almost everyone.


You have a strong personality, but you keep it under wraps unless the occasion calls for it.

Your savvy and intelligence is very cool. People turn to you for what to like and what to do.


You have an eye for what is on trend, but you're never intimidating or a snob. You like to share your finds with everyone. 



Kitlers

Pride - Syntax

I was flippin' through channels on the TV the other day and caught the last part of a "Bones" episode and this song was playing.  I hadn't heard of the group Syntax and while reading about them, found out this song and others by the group had been used in other television programs and a few movies. 

This is a fan-created video; I didn't find an official video.  Another YouTube video had also been made by a fan that looked like it fit the lyrics, but it wasn't available for embedding.

June 6, 2013

The Longest Day

Trailer for the classic movie, The Longest Day. One of my favorite war movies, it's chock-full of stars including Richard Burton, Sean Connery, Henry Fonda, Peter Lawford, Roddy McDowall, Robert Mitchum, Robert Ryan, Rod Steiger, Stuart Whitman, John Wayne and many more.



Today is the anniversary of the Normandy landings in 1944, arguably the most important day of WWII. Touring the D-Day beaches is on my bucket list.

June 5, 2013

My New Avatar


Music Album Cover Locations

As regular readers of this blog know, I'm a huge Google Earth fan. One of my favorite sites to which I subscribe via my Google reader is Google Earth Hacks, which posts interesting sites to visit via the GE application and also supplies the .kmz file for the location.

One of the latest posts has Music Album Cover Locations, places around the world where album covers were photographed.



Recognize the place? Perhaps the album cover insert (too small to be seen in the above screenshot) will give it away.



Yes, it's Abby Road in London, the street where the Beatles took the name for one of their most famous albums.

The .kmz file has many other great album covers and locations; some more Beatles records, as well as others from ABBA, Pink Floyd, Creedence Clearwater Revival, Elton John and more.

Download the file at:

Music Album Cover Locations

June 4, 2013

Farewell Faithful Fido

Did you know President Lincoln's dog Fido was "assassinated" by a drunk in Springfield, IL. just a year after Lincoln was shot and killed?  Fido, a yellow retriever-shepherd mix had been the President's faithful companion for over five years.


The Blame Game

Just before I went to bed late last night, I saw an article about Michael Douglas where he blamed his throat cancer on - 'scuse me - oral sex.  He didn't blame it on smoking, drinking or poor diet.

It made me think about it all day today.  Even if there was proof of what he said caused it, I don't think I'd announce that fact to the world.  I finally came to this conclusion:

Just like most liberals, he wants to put all the blame on bush.

A Cool Job

Did you know President Barack Obama's first job was scooping ice cream ? The future President worked for Baskin-Robbins in Honolulu during a high-school summer vacation in the mid-70's.

R.I.P. Deacon Jones

Deacon Jones was terrorizing opposing NFL quarterbacks when I first got interested in football;  when I played, I tried to emulate his famous head slap when I could (get away with it). Even when his Rams played the Cowboys, my favorite team, I couldn't help but admire the ferocious way he played. (I think there's at least two sacks of Dallas QBs in the video.

Deacon Jones
December 9, 1938 - June 3, 2013

June 2, 2013

Sunday Double Feature

A quiz and music to fit the topic, just like I like to do 'em.

You Are Sunday
Above all else, you value quiet time and rest. You love to unwind and recharge.

You think life is stressful enough, and you like to find peace whenever and wherever possible.

Over the years, you've figured out who and what means most to you. You hold on to what matters.


Sunday is the perfect day for you to be close to your loved ones and favorite rituals.

Even when life is busy and chaotic, you are able to stand back and look at the big picture.


You try to live in the moment and not get bogged down by the little annoyances of every day life. 






Pleasant Valley Sunday - The Monkees

June 1, 2013

Hair of the Dog - Nazareth



A little personal story: It wasn't long after this song had been released when I bought a brand new "quadraphonic" stereo with four speakers. I purchased the stereo from the hardware store in my home town, paying about fifty bucks more than I should have. I could barely wait to get some new records to listen to and the first album I bought was the Nazareth album with this song on it. I hastily unwrapped the cellophane wrapper and carefully handling the vinyl on the edges as so not to get fingerprints on the record's grooves, I started the turntable and turned up the volume.

After the opening riff, I stepped away to go to the bathroom.  I got done, walked back into the room where the stereo was and smelled an acrid, burning odor.  About that time the speakers crackled and emitted a high-pitched whine...then smoke started pouring out of the back of my brand new stereo.  I quickly unplugged it before it caught on fire.

It wasn't TOTALLY ruined, I had it fixed...to the tune of about half of what I had paid for it.  (and yes, I tried to take it back to the store, but he told me to send it to the factory...in Taiwan.)

I was as mad as the S.O.B. they're singing about in the song.