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August 14, 2014

desiderium



desiderium noun, plural desideria [des-i-deer-ee-uh]

1. an ardent longing, as for something lost.


I often long for things I've lost - money I've blown, old friends who have moved away or died, the trust of people I care about, but the thing I miss the most is my youth.

Oh, not ALL of it, just the best parts, like playing ball and feeling full of energy and the thrill of being totally in love. I don't miss waking up and having a zit on the end of my nose or worrying about grades or if my girlfriend was starting to like someone better than she did me.

So...I miss the sports and enthusiasm but not the rest of the teen angst. I'm pretty sure that wasn't "love" I was feeling at the time, either, but simply a product of raging hormones.

Mine aren't raging these days, but they're still there.  I'm missing someone to prove it to, though.

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