August 30, 2013
Snow Accounting For Stupidity
When I was active in MSN Groups, it was fun for the members of the group to gather in the chat room. It was private, restricted to only members of that group and we used to use them for weekly trivia contests, but would also sometimes set a time to meet at least once a week and catch up on what was going on in each other's lives.
I used to pop into the chat room of a group I belonged to and would find a good online friend in there all alone. He was the asst. mgr. of the group and the mgr. insisted he "open" the chat room on specific times of scheduled chat sessions. I never understood why he let her have that much control over him, but I suppose he was lonely and his online interaction was all he had.
The group had several members who would always show up for the chat and I particularly disliked one woman from Boston who would come in and try to dominate the conversation. She was childish and stupid and would often complain if the conversation was moving too fast - apparently she couldn't type fast enough to reply to every other person and it made her angry. Also, if the topic didn't interest her, she would change the subject if she could and if the topic was of anything close to being of an "adult" nature, especially about sex, she would type letters in and hold the key down, looking something like this:
My friend: Man, that movie I watched was pretty dirty for network TV.
Me: You ever see any X-rated films?
Someone Else: Oh yeah, back in college.
My friend: No.
Someone Else #2 My husband tries to get me to watch his dirty movies all the time.
Me: I saw Deep Throat right after it came out. Was really funny.
The Woman: XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXYYYYYYYYYYYTTTTTTTTTTTTPPPPPPPPPP IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMQQQQQQQ
QRRRRRRRRRSSSSSSSSSTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTJJJJJJJJJJJJJLLLLLLLLKKKKKMMMM
The rest of us would stop chatting, then the woman would say "Stop that! You should be ashamed!"
Good grief.
It was then I would usually exit the chat room, along with some of the others, leaving my poor cyber-friend all alone with the puritan nutjob. I'd pop in again later and if she was gone, I'd hang around. Sometimes she'd suddenly appear on the screen again, prob. hoping to catch us talking about something naughty. I saw her chew out some women who were talking about the problems of finding a bra that fit. "DON'T TALK ABOUT THAT IN FRONT OF THE MEN!!!!!!" she "shouted" in all-caps.
One time, my pal asked me if we'd had any snow. He lived in Kansas, about two hundred miles north of me. I told him not as much as they had received, only a dusting. The woman was in the room and weather wasn't a taboo subject, but she certainly didn't want anyone else talking about THEIR weather.
"We had a smegma of snow." she announced. "Made the streets a little slick." I sat there for a few seconds, rubbed my eyes, wondering if I had really seen what I thought I had seen. She rambled on some more, but I interrupted her.
"A 'smegma'?" I asked. "Yes," she replied. "That's the word we use for 'light dusting' up here in Boston." I could almost hear her saying that in her holier-than-thou, superior manner. I couldn't let it go.
"You sure about that?" I asked. "Yes." she sniffed, probably thinking I was some ignorant Texan fool.
Now, you may or may not know what Smegma is, but if not, follow that link to the Wikipedia article and you'll see what it is....and how much delight I took in telling her what smegma really was. Yup, I'm sure it made the streets slick.
I used to pop into the chat room of a group I belonged to and would find a good online friend in there all alone. He was the asst. mgr. of the group and the mgr. insisted he "open" the chat room on specific times of scheduled chat sessions. I never understood why he let her have that much control over him, but I suppose he was lonely and his online interaction was all he had.
The group had several members who would always show up for the chat and I particularly disliked one woman from Boston who would come in and try to dominate the conversation. She was childish and stupid and would often complain if the conversation was moving too fast - apparently she couldn't type fast enough to reply to every other person and it made her angry. Also, if the topic didn't interest her, she would change the subject if she could and if the topic was of anything close to being of an "adult" nature, especially about sex, she would type letters in and hold the key down, looking something like this:
My friend: Man, that movie I watched was pretty dirty for network TV.
Me: You ever see any X-rated films?
Someone Else: Oh yeah, back in college.
My friend: No.
Someone Else #2 My husband tries to get me to watch his dirty movies all the time.
Me: I saw Deep Throat right after it came out. Was really funny.
The Woman: XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXYYYYYYYYYYYTTTTTTTTTTTTPPPPPPPPPP IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMQQQQQQQ
QRRRRRRRRRSSSSSSSSSTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTJJJJJJJJJJJJJLLLLLLLLKKKKKMMMM
The rest of us would stop chatting, then the woman would say "Stop that! You should be ashamed!"
Good grief.
It was then I would usually exit the chat room, along with some of the others, leaving my poor cyber-friend all alone with the puritan nutjob. I'd pop in again later and if she was gone, I'd hang around. Sometimes she'd suddenly appear on the screen again, prob. hoping to catch us talking about something naughty. I saw her chew out some women who were talking about the problems of finding a bra that fit. "DON'T TALK ABOUT THAT IN FRONT OF THE MEN!!!!!!" she "shouted" in all-caps.
One time, my pal asked me if we'd had any snow. He lived in Kansas, about two hundred miles north of me. I told him not as much as they had received, only a dusting. The woman was in the room and weather wasn't a taboo subject, but she certainly didn't want anyone else talking about THEIR weather.
"We had a smegma of snow." she announced. "Made the streets a little slick." I sat there for a few seconds, rubbed my eyes, wondering if I had really seen what I thought I had seen. She rambled on some more, but I interrupted her.
"A 'smegma'?" I asked. "Yes," she replied. "That's the word we use for 'light dusting' up here in Boston." I could almost hear her saying that in her holier-than-thou, superior manner. I couldn't let it go.
"You sure about that?" I asked. "Yes." she sniffed, probably thinking I was some ignorant Texan fool.
Now, you may or may not know what Smegma is, but if not, follow that link to the Wikipedia article and you'll see what it is....and how much delight I took in telling her what smegma really was. Yup, I'm sure it made the streets slick.
Blade Runner - 1949
Clever parody of Film noir using the classic sci-fi flick Blade Runner plot. (and Blade Runner is a leading example of Neo-noir)
RRR GGG BBB
Out of all the Time Wasters we've posted - or will post - RRR GGG BBB is the least interesting and probably the one that the least time will be wasted viewing it.
(If you spend more than a minute on the page - Congratulations! You're more easily amused than me!)
Scroll over the R - G - B graphic and the letters will be spoken in a mechanical (creepy) voice and the background will change to the corresponding color. Do it quickly enough, and you might induce an epileptic seizure.
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